Moving on
by DulceDulce DeLeche
Summary: Logan cheats, Rogue runs. What does destiny have planned for Rogue, nothing good. All mistakes are my own.
1. Chapter 1

-1A/N _Note: I don't own any of the X-men. This takes place a few years after X1. Partly AU: Logan is back from searching. The biggest changes would be Sabertooth is living in the mansion, he's part of the X-men, yet still his growly self._

_**It was the greatest feeling I ever had. Followed abruptly by the worst feeling I ever had. Blow**_

Rogue had finally done it, after four years of not being able to touch, she had figured it out. Deliriously happy making her way to tell him that they could finally be together with out scarves or gloves. The sounds of grunts and rutting coming from his room, weren't registered until she was about to open the door.

Just as her hand settled on the door knob when she finally registered the noise on the other side. She heard _her_ voice and by the sounds of it thoroughly enjoying herself.

"oh Logan, harder, yeah right there", a gruff "fuck, you like that huh" was the reply.

She didn't think her heart could shatter with a few words but it did. She carefully opened the door, she didn't want to but had to see with her own eyes. There they were with his back to her so he didn't see her. He was taking her from behind riding her like only the Wolverine could, and Jean was enjoying every second of it. and then everything was blurry it took a moment to realize that it was the tears in her eyes.

Slowly she closed the door behind her, so as not to startle the couple. Little did she know that a pair of feral eyes was taking in her every move and scent. Perhaps it was his time to take what he'd always wanted.

Making her way back to her room Rogue remembered all the moments that they had shared together. How shortly after she graduated they had gone on a road trip to Alaska, where they had made love. Looking back he had never promised her anything, never told her he loved her. They never even talked about being in an exclusive relationship, as if the Wolverine could ever be in a relationship. She had told herself that his actions spoke louder than words ever could, that he did love her, or as much as he could love anyone. Like a stupid love sick teenager she had built her dreams around a man that cared so very little for her. He had taken her heart out with a hot poker and stomped all over it. Looking at herself in the mirror all she could think of was how stupid she was to think that she could possible compete, she wasn't even in the same league. She wasn't graceful, poised and polished like Jean was, or exotic and calm like Storm was. She was just plain old Marie, with voices in her head, untouchable skin, and now apparently unlovable as well.

In a fit of rage she tore apart her room unconsciously breaking every present he had ever given her, when she was done the room looked like a tornado had blown through when she finally looked in the mirror again she noticed the chain that was peaking out from under her shirt, tearing it off and throwing it across the room.

finally spent of all her energy she collapsed on her bed, in gasping sobs. After quite some time she caught a glace at herself in the mirror "that's what you get Marie, for ever trying to be normal or have something for yourself", she silently promised herself that she would pick herself up and move on. _Shit_ if he could fuck around with no regard for her, then she'd be dammed if he saw her pining away for him. She may not have much left but she had her dame pride and even the Wolverine would not take that away from her.

She closed her eyes, locking everything inside of her. No one knew about their "relationship", they had wanted to keep it private. And she was going to morn in private as well.

The next morning brought with it a coldness in rogue that she never thought she was capable of. She started making plans there was no way she was going to stick around because she may be able to accept the fact, that the man she loved had broken her, but she wasn't going to stick around to rub salt in an open wound, there was only so much hurt she could put herself through.

The summer break from College was just starting, it was perfect she'd go away on a trip and might just not come back. Glancing at the clock it was 7:00 she could have breakfast while everyone was still asleep, and then have a quick meeting with the professor. Taking a quick shower she headed down, fully expecting to be alone yet not surprised to see Scott sitting down, just staring at his breakfast as if it was the second coming. He was so distracted that he didn't even notice her until she was sitting next to him.

They took one look at each other and knew what the other was going through. At that moment she felt so bad for him, his wife had been fucking another man. Knowing that there were really no words that would might bring comfort, instead they ate in silence.

"I'm leaving not sure when I'll be back or even if, but you should probably take some time too, I'm sure Alex would love a visit from you. Take care of yourself."

"Rogue, be careful."

After having spoken with the professor who of course had told her that this would always be her home, and to please keep in touch. Keeping metal tabs with cerebro was almost impossible unless she willingly let her mental shields down, even then it was incredibly strenuous for the professor, it great distances.

Deciding that some shopping was order for a drastic change of wardrobe. Gone would be long sleeves and gloves. She took off in one the cars for a day of shopping and pampering. A few hours later armed with a car full of clothes, she decided that it was also time for a new look, off to the beauty salon to be pampered.

First thing to go, was her long dark mane, her hair now rested just above her shoulders. Next was colour. She decided to get rid of the white streaks and color her hair a deep Cherry almost black to the eye. The end result was actually better than she had imagined. _(Think Charlize Theron in Aeon Flux)._

Finally home at home she began to back her bags. About an hour later car packed up keys in had and one last sweep of her room, was when she noticed the tags that were on the floor next to her dresser. With a deep sigh she bent over and picked them up. She held them in her bare hands and felt the weight in them, what had once given her great comfort, now felt like an albatross around her neck. Closing her eyes so many memories flashed in her mind. Hadn't she always given him everything inside of her, sharing her dreams with him, her hopes, and now it felt tainted like she had never really belonged to him, to anyone.

Taking deep breaths she tried desperately to center herself. Taking a plain white envelop from her draw she placed the tags inside. With a heavy heart she wrote _Wolverine_ and nothing more on the front sighing to herself, "I'm sorry I wasn't enough for you, I'm sorry that I ever got in your way", she whispered to the empty room. Willing the tears not to come, she closed the door to the room and to her heart as well.

Deciding which way go was relatively easy, now that she no longer needed the gloves to hide behind she was wanted to head some place warm, where she could wear as little clothes as possible. She started driving west she really wanted to feel some sand on her feet and decided that California would do. However destiny would have other plans for her.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 The Road Trip. Cut Short**

_**Know which way the wind blows**_

Not a day into her road trip and Rogue started to feel sick. It started out with her stomach feeling uneasy and turned into constant throwing up anything and everything she ate. She was moody and achy and just plain irritable. At first she though it was the flu. However she hit Nevada and just couldn't take it anymore. Heading to the first doctor she could. Standard usual testing had Rogue back at the doctor's office in the morning.

"Good morning, how are you feeling today, Miss. Xavier."

"Not that good, I've thrown up three times already and it's only 8:30, I'm hoping that you can give me something to clear whatever this is up".

"Well Ms. Xavier, your blood work came back and you are in perfect health. According to these results you are pregnant, very early perhaps 4-5 weeks. An ultrasound will provide us with an accurate due date. Congratulations."

Rogue was in total shock, the doctor kept going on about prenatal care, and if she needed an OB/GYN. She still couldn't get past being pregnant, before she knew it, she had an appointment to see another doctor in a month's time.

"I can't believe this I'm pregnant, with Logan's baby", Rogue didn't know how long but she guessed that she must had been sitting in her car at least an hour before heading back to her motel room.

After a hot shower she laid on the bed, not knowing quite what to do. She was going to be a mother, a single mother.

"A baby, oh my god".

It was so bittersweet, on one hand she never thought she would ever have the chance to be a mother, once her mutation hit, she had given up on that dream. It was almost like fate was giving her a second chance. And on the other hand, her baby would grow up without a father.

"I'm going to love this baby enough for the both of us".

With that though in mind she fell asleep. She dreamt of Logan and Jean, except they were having a baby. Logan looked so happy, he was holding a baby boy in his arms, gushing at Jean "my boy". She woke up sobbing, she could hear his voice over and over again in her head. It felt like her heart had shattered all over again.

It was like a slap in the face, in spite of everything that he had done to her, she still only wanted him to be happy, and if his happiness was Jean then who was she to stop him. There was a part of her that always knew Jean was the love of his life, that he was just making time with her waiting for the right moment. The signs had always been there she had just chosen to ignore them, she though that if she loved him enough he would realize how much he loved her.

Could she ever tell him about the baby! Would he be happy? Would he even care? She didn't want to tie him to her out of some sort of obligation. She had been slowly trying to let go of Logan, and now she knew that every time she would look at her baby, she would always remember him. She'd never be able to truly move on the baby would always tie her to Logan whether either one of them wanted or not. She only hoped that when the day came she would be strong enough to face whatever came.

Realizing this line of thinking would get her no where, she tired to focus on the present. First thing she would have to find a job and quick, babies cost money and she would need a lot in a short amount of time.

"I only hope Vegas will be good to me."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three Vegas Stars and _Strips_

_**Music has charms to soothe the savage breast **_William Congreve, in _The mourning bride_, 1697

She smelt him before she saw him. Her sense of smell was pretty good after having absorbed so much of Logan in the past. What the hell was he doing here, there was no way this was a coincidence, for some reason he was looking for her. The only question was why?

"Well I hope he enjoys the show, this one is definitely for you Sugar".

The music came on and this was her queue, despite having been dancing for a few weeks she had quickly become a favourite. Clearing around seven to nine grand a night, which was really good for an experienced Vegas stripper.

Rogue had to give herself credit she didn't shy away or play it down. She danced like he was the only one in the room, keeping her eyes on him for the entire song, by the end of the dance she had gotten the most tips ever. She made her way to the dressing room to get ready for her next number realizing she had more time she decided to see what her visitor wanted.

"So what brings you to Vegas Creed"

Not wanting to admit defeat Victor tired to play it down "Just passing threw, thought I could use some entertainment for the night. How about it frail you up for job."

Rogue knew she was playing with fire but something about Victor had always attracted her, he was so similar to Logan, yet so different. Logan was always fighting Wolverine every step of the way, where as Victor embraced Sabertooth. He never tried to hide his true nature or make excuses for it. He was who he was, everyone else be damned.

"Sorry sugar, but there is a strictly no touch rule. Don't think you're the type to look, and keep your _claws_ to yourself." In spite of herself she really couldn't help but wonder what he would taste and feel like. Her heart may have been shattered but a girl still had needs, finally having mastered her gift, she so very badly wanted to feel bare skin, or was it _his_ skin? _Damn_ those stupid hormones.

"You'd be surprised at the self restraint I'm capable of _frail_."

"Well if you're willin' to pay then…." she didn't finish the sentence if he wanted something he would have to out right and ask. She was about to walk away her number was coming up.

"private dance back room", he growled, making a point by not laying a hand on her.

She couldn't help the smirk that came to her face "I'm up next, meet me in the back room once I'm done, the bouncer will show ya the way".

Walking to the back private rooms she tried to clam her heart, she could feel it pumping hard and fast. What a surreal moment she was about to give Sabretooth a lap dance, a _private_ lap dance It was almost laughable, if not for the desire running threw her, she blamed it on the hormones. She knew he would probably smell the difference on her, if he hadn't already. There was a part of her (probably the Logan in her) that was telling her, no screaming at her to run in the other direction and not turn back. Still another part wanted to know what he would feel like, especially now that she could touch it was almost like her hands had a mind of their own and they wanted Victor Creed.

Walking into the room she could feel his eyes devour her, the way they roamed her body, and rested on her belly, silently telling her he knew. Surprisingly this gave her the confidence she needed. She wasn't wearing much but started to slowly strip away.

She then straddled him, never taking her eyes off of him. She roamed her hands over his chest, she wanted so badly to feel his bare skin but knew that being that bold would get her in trouble. At first she thought she read him wrong she couldn't believe he hadn't made a move on her, he kept his hands by his sides clenches into to fists. Then she felt just how aroused he was. Once again growing in her confidence she proceeded to move her body against his tentatively at first, then growing more frantic with need, she could feel her entire body hum with pleasure.

Her breasts were highly sensitive and her nipples hardened as they rubbed against his dress shirt. She knew she was about to come as she grinded against his erection, and by the look on his face knew that he wasn't far off. Gathering all the courage she could muster Rogue leaned forward and kissed him on the lips, and bit him hard enough to draw blood from his bottom lip. Rogue thought she might go deaf from the growl that Sabertooth let out as she licked the few drops of blood that had dropped before the cut quickly healed up. Both were breathing hard and after a few moments Rogue gently got off his hap and started a backwards striptease.

"that was on the house sugar. See you around", walking out on shaky legs Rogue didn't think she'd be seeing him any time soon. She didn't know how wrong she was.

Later in her apartment she took a long hot shower. The orgasm she had earlier had barely taken off the edge, she needed more. But more of what? more sex, or more Sabertooth. Her emotions where completely out of control, "God I need to get laid." Looking in the dark for a t-shirt to sleep in, Rogue felt a pair of eyes on her, how had she not smelt him before she couldn't say, a true testament that her hormones were out of whack.

"Breakin' and' enterin', isn't exactly practising restraint."

They contemplated each other in silence for a long time neither of them wanting to break the silence. Surprisingly she wasn't fearful as she supposed she should have been, I mean come on she was in a room half naked with the most feral mutant on earth, her insides were quaking, and it wasn't from fear. Daring a look at his face his eyes were closed taking a closer look she could see his nose flaring and knew he could smell her and exactly what she was feeling.

Biting her lip Rogue took a few steps towards him until she was right in front of him. Contemplating her next move she brought her finger and caressed the furry brows over his eyes. Not a single emotion covered his face. Slowly she traced the features of his face so masculine and feline. She was taking him in and was startled at his words.

"I won't touch you until you say so." he all but purred into the palm of her hand as it caressed his cheek.

Was this some kind of joke, was someone impersonating him. This was completely out of his character. Sabertooth took what he wanted, when he wanted, and everyone else be damned.

Sensing her doubt he spoke "It's your scent, it keeps the more vicious feral instincts at bay. Feral's can be more animal than human, and in the wild when a female is carrying, it's the place of the strongest in the pack to protect. That simple, I can't hurt you frail, quite the opposite."

Rogue still couldn't believe it, maybe it was Mystique "take a hit if you need to be sure it's me", what the hell was he physic all of a sudden. Her fingers where resting on his jaw she decided that she would slip just a little to get the surface thoughts. Every so slightly, Rogue concentrated so she would get his surface thoughts and not his mutation. A small shy smile made it's way to her face as she gently kissed his closed eyes.

"You can touch me if you want", the words were spoken so quietly if it hadn't have been for his mutation then he wouldn't have heard her.

Scooping her up in his massive arms, he carried her to the bed and took her shirt off, his heated gaze travelled over her body. Rogue shivered from anticipation, and then his hands were all over her, she could feel the scrap of his claws over her skin. His mouth licking and kissing every inch of her skin. First one finger then two started to slowly stroke her, then he lowered his head and as his fingers assaulted her his tongue did no less, licking and sucking. Rogue couldn't help but buck her hips into his face as her orgasm ripped through her. Her entire body felt like it was on fire, before she was able to come down from her high she felt him enter her. She braced herself for a ruthlessness that never came.

It was tender and sensual in way that she had never experienced before. With Logan everything had always been about ownership, possession, and marking her. When Logan made love to her he did wanting to own her mind, body, and soul, whether he wanted it or not. Not that is wasn't enjoyable, but this was something altogether different. His tongue was lapping at her breast while his hand caressed her backside. This wasn't Sabertooth, this was Victor. Could this have been what he would have been like, had life been better, kinder for _him_, to _him_. Was Sabertooth the cold hearted ruthless monster the labs and a god awful father had created.

While this was going on in her head, her hands had a life of their own, they caressed his back urging him on. While her lips pressed kisses to his chest and neck. She started thrusting her hips into his, they both lost any semblance of rhythm as they started to peak. Closing her eyes she could have sworn she saw stars burst behind her eyes. He growled and the vibrations shook through her and she knew how satisfied he was.

Rolling on to his back, she tucked herself into his side she was awed by how tender he had been such a far cry from what he was capable of. From what she had absorbed from him this wasn't love but comfort and some inexplicable need to protect. There were no words to be said and they both found comfort in the silence as the drifted off to a restful sleep.

The next few weeks brought with it a comfortable pattern for both, they would sleep most of the morning go out for a huge brunch, and Rogue would head off to work. There were no long talks, in fact speaking had been minimal at best, they had established a routine and that was that. Sabertooth would usually meet her later watching the show and even paying for a few more private dances. They would go home and mate like bunnies. But as the story goes all good things come to an end, a very bad end.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four Fire and Steel

_**Hope is a light we keep inside that no one can touch. Jermaine J. Evans **_

After two weeks trouble came calling in the name of Abbott Laboratories. Neither Rogue or Sabertooth ever felt it coming. Rogue woke up feeling groggy and sicker (if that was even possible) than usually. Looking around Rogue found herself in a small dark dingy cell with a solid steel door and a small opening at the bottom, much like solitary confinement. There was a small light above her head that was flickering and was giving her a headache.

Trying to recall how she got there the last thing she remember was leaving the club and heading for her car Victor had told her he would meet her at her apartment, she was getting into her car and felt a sharp prick in the back of her neck, and then nothing. "Fuck they must have drugged me, where the hell am I." Her hand went to her belly and prayed everything would be alright. She was only about two and a half months into her pregnancy and hoped that whoever had taken her would not find out. As Rogue was contemplating her fate she heard a sound that filled her with terror, it was a roar so deafening that she had to cover her ears. There was no mistaking who had made the sound. Rogue couldn't help but wonder what she had got Sabertooth into, there was no doubt in her mind that it was her they had come for. She was suddenly over come with dread more for her unborn baby than for her. _Would it ever even be born? Would she ever see it be born?_

Thousands of miles away Charles Xavier held his head in his hands trying to block out the pain he felt from another mutant. The pain was so crippling and had Charles desperately trying to put up walls to stop the onslaught of fire that coursed through his body as if he was being burned alive. The pain was so intense that he promptly passed out.

Rogue didn't know how much time went by when she heard footsteps outside her cell. She could make out that the door beside her own cell was opened and heavy thump was heard as it was slammed shut. My god the smell was like burnt flesh, and had her heaving the little that was left in her stomach. The next thing she saw was her cell door open and about five men dressed in black head to toe and wearing masks enter her room four had guns and one a needle in his hand.

"Hold her down". Taking a deep breath she decided that now was not the time to fight, the last thing she felt were hands holding her down and then everything went dark.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five Who Are My Friends

_**Keep your Friends close and your enemies even closer. **_**Sun-tzu**  
_Chinese general & military strategist (400 BC)_

Charles looked around the room with a heavy heart, he decided that the direct approach would be best. Despite the tension between the members of the x-team, he was sure that everyone would keep a level head save one. He hoped that by having everyone together he could defuse any potential violent outburst and prepare them for the task at hand.

Clearing his throat Charles began "for those of you that are not aware, yesterday I suffered a sort of psychic sos. I have only ever felt this once before. In this particular case the mutant was in great pain and their suffering became mine so to speak. For a brief moment I was bombarded with a few images but mostly with the intense pain that was happening to them at that moment".

"Professor do you know who that mutant was."

Taking a moment to try and put together his thoughts. "Yes Storm I do. It was Victor Creed. As you know he left on personal leave and it seems that he has been captured and is being tortured and experimented on. I spent all night trying to pinpoint his location but, thus far I have had no luck."

"What aren't you tellin' us chuck."

Rubbing at his temple he told himself that bad news was like ripping off a band aid "I was not able to pick up his location but other images have led me to believe that he is not alone." Bracing himself and ensuring his metal walls were up he continued "wherever it is that they have him, Rogue is there as well. I tried to pick up her metal signature but due to the nature of her powers it is almost impossible to track her unless she chooses. Wherever they are it's blocking any kind of mental links or signatures. The last place I was able to pick anything up was Las Vegas, some time two nights ago".

"What the fuck do you mean, you told me she was fine."

Before Charles could response Scott beat him. "she wouldn't be in this situation if it wasn't for you".

Wolverine snarled "you had better keep your mouth shut about what you don't understand one-eye."

"Or what, what are you going to do, there isn't anything left that you could possible do to me Wolverine".

Charles could feel the headache coming in and groaned " gentlemen, please there are more important things at hand than whatever is going on between you to. I will ask that you put your personal quarrels aside for now and concentrate on locating Sabertooth, and Rogue. I suspect they are in a laboratory of some sort and whoever it is that has them knows what they are capable of it seems that they have taken precautions towards their mutations."

"Professor, what exactly did you see. What were they doing to Sabertooth."

"They set him on fire" a collective gasp was heard around the room. "His mutation is keeping him alive and from what I can tell they are keeping him heavily sedated. I saw Rogue through his peripheral vision, as she was being taken dragged away."

No one noticed the red glow in the Jean's eyes as they the professor mentioned Rogue, nor the smirk that passed her face before she was able to mask it with a look of concern.

"Obviously I will keep trying Cerebro, perhaps those around have seen something I will start at the place she was last seen. Shadowcat I would like you to search on the computer and see if you can find any abnormal activity with any major laboratory companies, for some reason I don't believe this is government related. The rest of you I will let you know once I have any leads. You are dismissed, Scott if you could please stay a moment."

"Scott I realize that you are going through your own personal problems, and the situation with Logan is a difficult one at Best. However you are the leader of the X-men and as such I expect for you, at least for the time being to behave accordingly. I fear that for whatever reasons behind Rogue's abduction there is much more going on. I do not wish to jump to conclusions, but I believe one of our own is responsible. I also believe that if we do not find them soon, there won't be anything at all to find. They will test the limits to both their mutations and then dispose of them, quickly".

Scott was reeling from the revelations, he wanted so desperately to believe that the professor was wrong, but the logical side knew that everything he had said was true. He by no means had the powers that the professor possessed but for the last few months had couldn't shake the feeling off that something was happening. Taking deep breaths to steady his emotions.

"Of course professor. As soon as you know anything let me know so I can prepare. Thank you for not holding out on any information. I'll be in the danger room". Closing the door behind him, sighing he sometimes wished he cold be more like a certain Canuck, and just let his emotions take over. Logan was the type to shoot first, shoot again, and then look for survivors.

He was a complete emotional mess on the inside. His role as leader was the only thing keeping him afloat. Everyone thought he was cold and a boy scout. No one not even his wife realized that he couldn't afford to wear his emotions on his sleeve that he had to be strong for those around him. He knew that no one could see his heart was broken into a million pieces.

Scott knew that whatever was coming was not good. He thought it best to mediate in order to be prepared for anything that might be coming. Trying to calm his raging emotions, and bring the level headed X-men leader to the front was more exhausting than he let on.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six Steel hands and Broken Dreams

A/N: This is a very dark chapter full of lots of angst. You have been warned.

_**There is no worse death than the end of hope. Pelagius **_

Rogue woke up strapped down on a metal table, it was like her nightmares shortly after she had absorbed Logan except so much worse. Whatever drugs they had given her were causing her to slip in and out of consciousness, one minute everything was dark and the next it was like she was looking at herself as some _"doctor" _was poking at her skin. Half her body was on fire and other was cold, numb and slightly blue whatever they were doing, it felt like she was in hell. And the physical pain was nothing compared to the mental damage they were inflicting on her.

As the days went by every time was worse and the procedures more invasive. As bad as they were, they didn't compare to the times when doctor _Claw_ was there. The other doctors never spoke to her and never looked at her, just did the procedure and left her in her own sweat, blood, and vomit.

Dr. Cameron Fitzgerald, or Dr. Claw as Rogue had dubbed him, was a tall thin blue eyed doctor with a right robotic hand. Dr. Cameron was a brilliant heart surgeon. About 10 years ago he had been in an accident involving a mutant woman. There had been a traffic accident and he had volunteered to be a field Dr. He had tried to wedge himself between two cars to get to the victim who was trapped. She was hysterical and was desperately trying to get free, the movements shook the car and the next thing he knew his hand was stuck. The end result had been amputation and being fitted with the latest in robotics. Still in was the end of his carer. Turing to Genetic Analysis, and his vengeance to rid the world of Mutants is what carried him on. Taking particular interest in Rogue's mutation he had become obsessed with her and wanted to humiliate her in every possible way. He had very special plans for this mutant and relished their _alone_ time. The doctor was a sadist. Oddly enough he never realized his need to punish Rogue came from her being very similar in appearance to that mutant from his accident. The one who had started it all.

When Claw was in charge of Rogue she would shiver inside. She discovered from the first procedure that he got off on her pain giving her enough sedative to keep her from moving around but to ensure that she felt every prick, scrap, and cut, among other things. He would take his robotic arm and touch Rogue in intimately. She would shiver from his metallic hand as it cupped her mound and brutally pawed at her breast. Claw laughed at her calling her a _filthy mutant whore_. Inside Marie wanted to cry, but Rogue and Magneto wouldn't let her. They wouldn't give the doctor the satisfaction of crying out in pain. Instead she would bite on her own tongue until she tasted blood.

Back in her cell after Claw would finish his torturous procedures, Rogue would let the tears fall. She wasn't sure how much time had gone by but it felt like an eternity. Rogue also knew that the drugs they were giving her were messing with her memory, there were things that she knew but the actual memory wasn't there. She couldn't remember anything at all about her childhood. She could only remember the last year with her parents before her mutation developed. Every day was worse than the one before. she struggled with trying to retain her memories. As much as Logan had hurt her they had shared so many good times, beautiful memories that filled her with hope in that dreaded cell where she found herself. Still there were huge holes in her recent memory she couldn't remember how she meet the professor or Jubilee, she knew there faces but couldn't place any actual memories with them. Even the more recent memories with Victor she cherished and tried desperately to cling to them.

Then when she though about Victor she would cry harder as her body shook with sobs. The last time she had seen him was a few days after they had been captured. They were both strapped down, side by side. The drugs in her system blurred everything and it was so hard just to keep her eyes open when she turned to her side she gasped at the sight that met her eyes. At first she didn't realize it was him. He was completely hairless, and his skin was red, pink and blotchy. If he hadn't opened his eyes and looked right at her she could have mistaken him for someone else. The doctors were about to conduct another experiment, when she realized what they were going to do she panicked and tried to free herself, but the cold metal shackles wouldn't even budge. She tried desperately to control her skin but what ever they injected her with was messing with her head and she couldn't grasp the control in her mind that was needed. The next thing she felt was Victor's mind rushing into hers, and then she was screaming, until her voice was horse and passed out.

That had been, God she didn't't even how long ago that was. She wasn't even sure if he was alive. The transfer hadn't been that long, but as his memories showed her later, his healing factor was maxed to the limit, it was barely keeping him alive. First they had used him as target practice and when they saw that he was rapidly healing they decided to see if he could recover from being burned alive. At first, it felt like the memories were happening to her, like her body was being consumed by flames. She was so doped up she couldn't compartmentalize Victors memories from her own and even Logan's memories were all meshing together to create a gruesome nightmare in her mind.

Victor's healing factor was kicking in, and the haze of the drugs begin to lift. Finally able to start building the psychic walls in her head to properly contain those that were in her head and restore some semblance of order to the chaos that was her mind.

Once Rogue could think semi clearly again the tears came again only this time for her baby. Putting her hands on her belly she couldn't help the sobs that escaped. She would have given anything to be rescued right now. Even if it meant being back at the mansion and watching Logan fuck the daylights out of Jean everyday for the rest of her life. The only thing that mattered was her baby. Was anyone even looking for her, probably not, she hadn't even made it a point to check with anyone at the mansion, and the only one that had come looking for her was Victor, and he was no better off than her perhaps even dead by her very own _skin_.

Victor, my god the sobs came even harder. She had heard Dr. Claw and how they were looking for her and lucked out by having Sabertooth there as well. It was all her fault. His memories of them together came to the front of her mind, and the psychic that was him tried to comfort her in his own way. That made her feel all the more guilty. He tried growling at her and pushing her not to give in, that he would find a way to get _her_ out of there. Even Logan told her to hold on and not give up, trying to assure her that he was looking for her.

Even if by some chance Logan was looking for her, she didn't think she could hold out very much longer. The experiments were getting more and more painful. Completely exhausted she let the darkness take her mind and hoped that they wouldn't come for her, at least not for today.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven ****Speak of the Devil**

_**A/N : Finally we get to see how Logan has is doing. **_

_**What doesn't kill me only makes me stronger School of hard Knocks**_

Logan couldn't be certain how many hours had gone by, as he sat in a pool of his own blood.

After storming out of Xavier's office, and received a severe lecture on the _brain phone _he made his way to the woods in the far reaches of the property. After shredding more than a few trees, he was so infuriated with himself, taking a deep breath he crossed his arms over his chest, and with a ear piercing growl, he thrust his claws into his chest, right where his heart was.

He couldn't keep the tears back any longer, after letting out his anger, all that was left was the sorrow inside of him. No matter how many times it would never be enough, his body would always heel. Marie was in a lab somewhere, being experimented on, and god knows what else, and he would always heel.

The tears came harder, and he blamed only himself. That stupid uptight ass hole summers was right, it was his fault that she had left. He should have gone after her the second she left, but the professor had told him to leave her she would come home when she was ready. And now she may not ever come home, _would she even want to?_

The cold of the forest floor made its way into his body as he lay on the ground, while silent tears made their way down his face. Would he ever see her again? Would he be able to tell her the truth? She owned him mind, body, and soul and she didn't even know it. He had always been aware of the doubt that surrendered her, but his reluctant heart refused to open up and tell her everything that was inside of him. The things that he wanted for them.

Staring into the dark night he could be completely honest with himself he was afraid. Afraid to be tied down, and worse that _she_ wouldn't want that, that in time she would want someone else. Ever since they had been together his biggest fear was that he would wonder to the company of another, or worse that she would. The Wolverine roared inside of him at the very idea. Logan wasn't as strong and whimpered.

How could he have been so stupid. That witch had gone into his head and messed everything up,…………….

_Flash back_

Logan was in his room killing time, while he waited for Rogue. They had plans to meet later and go out, when he heard a knock on the door.

Smelling her before opening the door "what do ya want Jeannie" he leered at her, hoping she'd go away faster.

"Can I come in, I wanted to talk to you."

Rolling his eyes "yah sure make it fast, I have plans in a bit. So what can I do for you, need me to scratch an itch for you."

"Actually I wanted to talk about you. I was in a session with the professor about my powers, and how they've grown. I'm pretty sure that I can get your memories for you."

Logan couldn't believe what he was hearing, could he finally have a name, a past, a family, that was his very own. With his past could he finally move on to the future that he wanted with Marie.

Quickly grabbing her hands he pressed them to his temples closing his eyes, silently pleading with her to please give him his past, something anything that was just his. Had he kept his eyes open perhaps he would have seen the wicked sneer that came over her face and the way her eyes glowed red.

"Just relax Logan, and this will go much more smoothly". Before he knew he was over come by a blinding pain and clutched his head in his arms. All of a sudden nothing was what it seemed everything was distorted, and it seemed as if he was in some sort of dream.

Once the pain had subsided it was almost like he was in a dream, and couldn't really remember where or who he was. He could feel himself floating away. As this was happening to Logan, Wolverine come roaring to the front and took over.

Wolverine was in the front and all he could smell was desire, and with all his inhibitions completely gone, there was nothing left to restrain him from taking what he wanted. And after being tightly restricted for so long Wolverine wanted to play.

Everyone thought that Wolverine a mindless animal that couldn't speak. What no one knew not even Logan, was that when he wanted Wolverine could be quite vocal. After that things went pretty quickly. In two steps he was in front of Jean and grabbed her by the arms and threw her on the bed.

Jeans eyes were blazing red and her body was covered in a light red glow. Wolverine sneered "it's what you've always wanted isn't it, darlin'". With a flick of his wrists the claws were out and they made short work of her clothes. Taking no time turning her over and thrusting in to her in one swift brutal stroke. Something in Wolverine didn't like the way she smelled and wanted to be as brutal and quick as possible. Wolverine just wanted to take, and if she was willing then take he would.

"oh Logan, harder, yeah right there", a gruff "fuck, you like that huh" was the reply.

While Wolverine was having a mediocre fuck at best, Logan didn't know where he was. He was drifting, somewhere between the past and present. It was almost like being in space he couldn't get a grip on anything, there was nothing, just nothing. And there were no memories to go by, couldn't remember who he was, not even his name.

Once the haze had lifted and Logan was back in the front of his mind, he looked around his bed room and Jean was under him naked as he was, and the smell of sex was strong in the room.

Trying to muster all the steel in his voice he could "What have you done", came out as more of a choked out sob.

"oh come now _Logan _I know you enjoyed that as much as I did. I'm sure Rogue won't mind sharing just a little" Jean didn't even try to contain the laugh that escaped her puny lips.

Logan visible blanched at the mention of Rogue's name taking another whiff of the room, he could smell her and the bitter smell of pain that accompanied her. Turing back Logan grabbed her by the throat and started choking the life out of Jean.

Jean snickered at first "you know I like it rough don't you Logan" but as his fingers tightened she started gasping for air. Jean's body started to glow red again and she used her powers to launch Logan across the room.

_End Flash back_

……even now the memories were foggy at best. It felt like everything had been some kind of dream or hallucination. Liked he'd been high on some sort of drug.

It didn't really matter though Rogue had seen him, and left, and now she was in a lab somewhere being treated no better than an animal. He couldn't help but blame himself, could he have fought Jean harder? why didn't he just close the door on her? or better yet just have left altogether?

Logan realized too late that his past wasn't as important as his future. As badly as he had wanted to know at the very least his name, perhaps even his mother's name, the cost was too great. He had been given the greatest give of all the love of a good woman and he had tossed it aside for the promises of a snake in sheep's clothing.

And now here he was lying on the cold forest floor in a pool of blood as his body healed and his soul shattered.

A/N : Well that was really hard to write. Hope it came across the way I wanted.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight- Beyond the Pleasure for the ID**

_The term id (inner desire) is a Latinised derivation from Groddeck's das Es, and translates into English as strictly "it". It stands in direct opposition to the super-ego. It is dominated by the pleasure principle. -Sigmund Freud-_

Charles had never been more frustrated in his life. He had spent most of the night and better part of the morning with Cerebro trying to find answers. It's as if they had vanished into thin air. No one knew anything, no one had seen anything, if he had any hair on his head then he would have been pulling it out by now.

Deciding that there really was no way around it, he needed to probe Jean's mind. There were greater things at stake than his ethic code. He knew what had happened between her and Logan, but not to what extent. Logan was reluctant to speak of what had gone on between them, not wanting anyone going through his mind further the Professor had let it go. Hoping that Logan would instead choose to come to him when he was ready.

Occasionally he would pick up some confusing thoughts from Jean, at first he thought it was her Id. For mutants with psychic abilities there Id could become their driving force if they didn't build up their physic shields strong enough. The Id's sole purpose was to feel pleasure and satisfaction at any cost.

As with all mutant Jean's powers were emotionally tied. But with Jean her powers would literally feed her Id (ego) with endorphins, creating an almost drug like high. If Jean indulged her Id to the extreme too often she would in essence become addicted much like a drug addict. This could quickly escalate from simple pleasure to sadistic tendencies as the Id would crave more and more intense emotions particularly the dark ones. The more intense the emotion, or darker it was, the _"bigger" _and _"better" _the high.

The Professor has seen the change in Jean slowly at first, and increasing as time went by. He had almost daily sessions with her trying to create physic boundaries for her and showing her how her Id could take over if she let it. In essence trying to show her good v. evil for lack of a better term. However Jean had to consciously take the step and want to have control of her emotions and powers.

This is where the problems began. Jean started to pull away almost keeping things from him and even Scott. Her reactions were becoming overwhelmingly intense, almost trying to provoke those around her and feeding off of their emotions particularly the darker ones. Jean was quickly becoming uncontrollable.

The only thing the professor could think of now was to put Jean into a physic coma he could probe her mind and find out exactly what was going on. There was no doubt in his mind that what was going on with Rogue and Sabertooth was Jean's doing. Knowing that he was the only one strong enough to take her on and get some answers he made his way to the med lab where she was. Putting up all his metal walls as he made his way down preparing to perhaps take apart his best student, the one that had come to be like a daughter to him. Where had he gone wrong? Was he too strict not patient enough, was he holding her back or had he always indulged her whims? A tear made it's way down his cheek as he rolled out of the downstairs elevator.

* * *

"Jean how are things going today"

"fine thank you profe…….".

A loud thud was heard in the room as Jean hit the floor in the med room.

****

**_A/N: Hope that came across the way I wanted._**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine **A house divided against itself cannot stand**

_**A red headed wolf in sheep's clothing**_

Mentally calling Hank to place her in a bed. Quickly probing her mind the professor couldn't get much her walls were still very much in place but it was enough to make him sick.

It was clear to Xavier that Jean had become a liability to herself and the school. Everyone was in danger. She had sold out to the worst possible people and they would be coming for them all. Xavier had Hank administer Jean a sedative, and called all his X-men to a meeting.

"What I am about to say will come as a shook to most of you. I am sure that you will all have many question, I ask that for the time being you put them aside, time is of the essence. I do promise to let you know everything once the immediate danger is over. As you can all see Jean is not present. For those of you that know Jean a long time you know that she has always struggled with her powers and trying to make the right choices has been a very difficult process for her. It has come to my attention that she has misused her powers, for her own pleasure purposes." No one said a word but they all thought he was referring to the Logan/Jean incident that had led to the fight with Scott, creating a mini Melrose Place in the mansion (having everyone playing the guessing game of who's sleeping with who, some even placing bets).

"I had my suspensions for some time and have tried to guide her as best I could without ethically invading her mind. Today I became aware of Jean's involvement with Rogue and Sabertooth's abductions."

Wolverine sneered "what the fuck do you mean."

"Logan please I will tell you everything but please do not interrupt or I will have you removed. Now then, it seems that Jean had contacted a doctor friend of hers who works for Abbott Laboratories. She made him aware of Rogue's mutation and pointed him in her direction. Sabertooth was in the wrong place at the wrong time. What Jean did not realize was that it would not stop there. This doctor has another agenda, they are searching for a cure to rid the world of mutants and I'm afraid that if we don't act quickly he will succeed. Scott I want you to prepare the team and be ready to leave within the hour. Hank I also want you to go. You are to go through the research and destroy it all, make sure that you don't leave anything behind it is of the utmost importance that they are unable to continue and work they may have been working on. Shadow Cat you will also destroy all computer records of any experiments and anything at all to do with mutants, names, dates, locations nothing. Storm and Jubliee you will stay behind, once I have given the co-ordinates to Scott of the Laboratory we will evacuate the school the children are our first priority. If this mission fails they will come for us and they must be protected at all costs. Contingency plans have been made for these circumstances. I will not divulge them at the moment as they are for each individual I will let you know at the appropriate time. I will keep a physic link to all of you and let you know when the time comes. You are dismissed please make your way to your rooms pack a small bag no ID and best of luck to you all. Scott Logan please remain behind." Everyone filed out with heavy hearts, off to say their goodbyes to their loved ones in private.

* * *

"How long have you known old man" Logan couldn't keep the contempt out of his voice. He had known and done nothing, if he hadn't been playing favourites they wouldn't be in this situation.

"Not as long as you think, and I didn't know to what extent until just a few moments ago." In a quite smooth voice, he continued "why didn't _you_ come to me? Why didn't _you_ let me know what was going on." The professor had seen most of what had happened between them, and didn't blame Logan for what happened, he had been clinically unaware of what had happened, his choices had latterly been taken from him.

"What is he talking about Professor" Scott wanted answers, they were keeping things from him and that was unacceptable. He was leader of the X-men and he needed, no _Had_ to know what was going on with all member of _his_ team damn it.

The professor snuck a glance at Logan to see his face, and sighed. Logan was a closed book knowing that he would say nothing else on the matter the professor took it upon himself to try and explain what was going on with Jean, and subsequently what had transpired between the two, and more to the point why Rogue was where she was, all without invading Logan's privacy.

"Please sit down Scott. Let me begin at the start. I've been having sessions with Jean to try and control her more primal urges. To try and guide her from acting on her impulses to get the satisfaction that her Id was demanding. In essence her Id was, and is feeding off the pleasure that she gets from using her powers. As time goes by it wants to feed more often and needs stronger emotions to do so. She is addicted to powerful emotions. She went after Logan knowing that she could get the most primal emotions out of him. Once she realized that Rogue was in the way she devised a plan to take her out. I believe she was trying to get some sort of revenge as it is one of the strongest emotions an Id can feed off." The professor hoped that would be enough, not wanting to really get into everything with Scott and trying to keep some semblance of privacy for Logan.

Logan was seething he couldn't believe it, he had know or at the very least suspected what was going on in her head and had done nothing. "You cold hearted bastard you knew and did nothing. Rogue is God knows where, and you could have done something. You could have gone in her mind like you did today. And now we are all paying for your mistakes".

The professor snapped. "What did you expect me to do go threw her mind, on mere suspicions. It's not like she was going to volunteer. Why didn't you let me go probing threw your mind or at the very least tell me what happened. You let everyone think that what happened was mutual, that you had gotten what you always wanted. When we both know what really happened." Before Logan had a chance to respond the professor continued. "Now I'm going back to Jean to get the location, and you both will prepare for the mission. Scott I know you have a lot of questions but there really isn't any time. I promise you that I will inform you of everything to you once we have more time."

With that the professor left both men stewing on information that the professor had revealed. All three men having the same questions weigh on their mind, Could the professor have stopped these chain of events from happening? And What was going to happen to them all?

**_Well there it is, hope your enjoying the story so far lots more angst to come so prepare yourselves. Thanks to all those of you that reviewed I just love the feedback._**


	10. Chapter 10

**_A/N: This is a very dark chapter you have been warned._**

**Chapter 10 ****Spare the Rod and Spoil the Child**

_**Everything passes away - suffering, pain, blood, hunger, pestilence. The sword will pass away too, but the stars will still remain when the shadows of our presence and our deeds have vanished from the earth. There is no man who does not know that. Why, then, will we not turn our eyes towards the stars? Why? Mikhail Bulgakov, from The White Guard **_

Rogue awoke to a pair of ice blue eyes staring at her, as his hand crawled over her bruised body, grinning as she shuttered under his robotic touch.

"Nice to see your awake." After a few moments of groping and pinching "Good I want you to watch".

Turing her head and trying desperately not to crumble in front of him, to try and hold it in until she was alone, and able to wash away the guilt with her tears. Willing her mind to go somewhere else anywhere else. Magneto and Sabertooth came to the front and tried their best to shield her from the things that were being done to her body. As the strong arms of Wolverine held her inside her mind, gently purring to her and offering comfort.

"oh come now, you now how much I like it when you look at me" she was sure that everyone in this hell hole could hear his evil chuckling. "Play nice now, or I'll have to be rough and we both know you don't want that, do you?" Rogue panicked, did he know that she was pregnant? "oh yes I've know from the first day they brought you in here, don't worry they don't have a clue. However, you should know that the hormones and experimental chemicals they injected you with yesterday will probably produce a miscarriage shortly."

Tears sprang to her eyes, no longer able to keep them in. The one thing that kept her going, the only reason she hadn't fought back or tried to end her own miserable life was so that her baby might have a chance. "You didn't really think that there was ever a chance did you? did you think that they would let your kind reproduce. We are so close to exterminating you and all those like you. You should be very proud of yourself, you are going to help us. Just a few more procedures and we can get rid of you filthy animals in one shot, literally."

"You are the key. We've isolated and almost mapped your particular mutation and will soon be able to mass produce a sort of serum that will work similar to your mutation. When you touch people skin to skin you suck the life out of them, and for longer periods you suck them dry. Our theory is to produce a serum much like your mutation, and introduce it in to other mutants it will suck them from the inside out. Similar to mummifying only at a much more rapid pace, and much more painful as the subject will be alive almost to end as this happens. We are very close, we have a few prototypes that we are testing out on your friend." Seeing her horrified face he added "don't worry by the time it hit's the mutant population you'll be dead."

With that Dr. Claw left her strapped down to a bed. Pumped full of drugs, in tears, and bleeding from his ministrations to her body.

The man was a monster. It had all been for nothing. She could barely remember her name, a few nicer memories of her and Logan, and a few of Victor. Almost everything else was gone. Sabertooth was probably dead. She felt violated all over again. This time she didn't even try to hold back the sobs. She cried for Sabertooth, for Logan, for herself, and for her baby. The baby that she would never get to hold, the baby who would never open it's eyes for the first time, the baby that would never take it's first breath.

* * *

Some time later a guard came helping her dress in those dreadful hospital gowns, to take her back to her cell. Grabbing her by the arm he began dragging her back. As he picked her up she started to feel a dull ache in her lower back, the closer she got to her cell the more painful it became. Then pain gripped her womb like claws, the pain was too much and she began to stumble. The guard made the mistake of getting to close to her, and her hand grazed the skin on his neck, he went down in less than a second.

Despite the pain that was gripping her abdomen, Rogue knew that this was her last and only chance to get away. Trying to focus she put to use the years of meditation that had helped her in the past, to use the memories she had absorbed from the guard. She knew where Victor was and needed to get to him, and get the hell of out there. They were keeping him on the other side of the compound under heavy sedation. Just great how the hell was she supposed to make a quick getaway with a sleepy Sabertooth.

Grabbing the pass card from the guard she started to make her way through the halls to the other side, when pain ripped through her back, gritting her teeth she tried to keep going, stumbling along the way. She slipped and fell, taking her hand between her legs she brought her fingers into her line of vision only to see it covered in blood. Closing her eyes as the tears fell, taking deep breaths she tried desperately to get back up and keep going. She needed to get away, even if she died because of the crap they had pumped into her, she didn't want them to see her die, never that, she couldn't, wouldn't give Dr. Claw the satisfaction.

_**Beware how you take away hope from another human being. Oliver Wendell Holmes **_

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	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11 The face that launched a thousand ships**

_Was this the face that launch'd a thousand ships  
__And burnt the topless towers of Ilium?  
__Sweet Jean, make me immortal with a kiss._

Professor Charles Xavier, looked like the oldest man in the world as he wheeled out of the med room where Dr. Jean Grey lay in a drug induced coma. Xavier had seen the extent to which Jean had gone. Not only had she taken advantage of Logan and plotted Revenge against Rogue turning her over to sadistic scientists. She had sleep her way through Congress, and conspired with the brotherhood. She had handed over mutants to those lunatic Doctor's, Rogue and Sabertooth hadn't been the first. And she had promised them more mutants. Mutants from the school, mutant children, to be experimented, tortured, and disposed of. Xavier was completely crushed, he had failed, as a mentor, teacher, protector, father. Fresh tears sprung to his eyes to add to the ones that had already fallen. Even if by some miracle the X-men succeeded he wasn't sure he had the strength to continue.

Mentally letting Scott know where the lab was, he began to take steps to evacuate the rest of the students from the school. He'd make sure they were safe if it was the last thing he would do. However there was still the matter of Jean. What to do with her? he couldn't let he go, she was a waking cyclone, leaving death and chaos behind. This was going to be the hardest thing he would ever have to do, it might even destroy him, but it had to be done.

Mentally communicating with Storm and Jubilee, they began boarding another aircraft. They would take the children on a "_vacation"_ to Scotland, where the professor had a mansion there equipped to handle them. Once everyone was settled Storm went to get the professor so that they could take off.

"Storm I won't be going."

"Professor, what are you talking."

"I will be staying behind, I will be inside Cerebro, keeping tabs on you and the children as well as the X-team on their mission."

"But I thought you said that if they failed they would come for us, here."

"Yes, they will."

"Professor, that's suicide. You can't stay here we need you, the children need you."

"I must stay not only to keep communicating with all of you, but I cannot leave Jean. She has gone down a path of no return, and she cannot be left alone. She is completely out of control. Storm, Scott is the leader of the X-men, but the run of the school has always been yours. That is why I didn't want you on the mission. If Scott should not return, you are to take over. Instructions have been left do not worry about anything of that sort, financially you'll never have to worry. If the mission fails do not come back, this will become a war zone. If any of the other X-men survive they too will be taken care of. It would be best to not try and locate them. I'm not sure how far things will escalate should they fail but I don't think it will be good. Storm your first priority will always be the children. Now please go before it's too late. More optimistically, if everything goes well you should be able to return with a week or two to be safe.

Please Storm, you are a strong leader and now is the time for that I can feel your reluctance, but rest assured I can take care of myself. Now go I will keep communication with you"

Giving Storm a mental nudge she left the Professor alone with Jean in the med lab. A tear made it's way down her cheek, for the man that had always been like a father to her. _Would she ever see him again?_

Leaving the Med lab the professor made his way to Cerebro to keep in contact with the team and try and guide them through this mission, perhaps for the last time. Giving Jean one last look confident that she would remain in her coma at least for the time being, and until he could decide how to proceed in restraining her permanently.

* * *

_Meanwhile in Jean's Subconscious _

_That stupid old man does he really think he can actually control me with his psychic barriers, and his never ending speeches in doing the right thing. Does he not have any idea how good it feels to finally do what I want, when I want. Can't he understand the high I got after personally dissecting those inferior mutants, and then watching as they were disposed of. Here I thought that he was the one person that could equal me in power, how wrong was I. _

_Don't worry you'll get yours Xavier, I promise._

_**A/N: Well there it is hope you enjoyed it. Just though I'd add a little bit about what's happening inside of Jean's mind. Well hear more from her soon. Let me know what you guys think. **_


	12. Chapter 12

****

**Chapter 12 Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more**

_I count him braver who overcomes his desires than him who conquers his enemies, for the hardest victory is over self. **Aristotle**_

****

The atmosphere on the blackbird was solemn and very quite. No one spoke to each other, all the could be heard was the mumbling of Nightcrawler as he prayed on his rosary. As each of the X-men contemplated their future they all knew what was at stake, this would be perhaps the most important mission they would ever be on. They also knew that some would probably not come back alive, and if they failed they might as well all die.

Cyclops didn't have the senses Wolverine had but he didn't need them to know what his team was feeling, he could feel the fear and anxiety that was in the air. As their leader he knew that he had to say something to lift their moral. But what do you say to your soldiers who most likely face certain death. How do you comfort them, when there is no comfort for yourself. Jean had always been his pillar of strength, silently encouraging him to be the leader that he was born to be. He'd never felt more alone than in this moment. He tried to focus on Rogue and Sabertooth. The man was not his favourite person by a long shot, but still he was part of his team for now and as such, it was his responsibility to get them out of the misery that they were in. No one deserved what was happening to them.

Mentally going over the plan and making sure that nothing was left to chance, he would give his life for his team to keep them alive, if not safe. Saying his own prayer to whom ever was listening he prayed that all of his team members made it out alive, even if it meant that he didn't make it. His gut told him that this might very well be his last mission, that just as Jean had been for Scott and she had chosen her own path of destruction. Cyclops had the X-men team, and today he was leading them straight into the bowels of hell.

Glancing at Wolverine he wondered if he could become the strong leader that Cyclops knew he could be. Shortly after their discussion with the professor Cyclops had gone to him and both men had made their peace.

* * *

_flash back_

After the professor had left Logan had stormed off, as usual to try and take his frustrations out on something. Well Scott wasn't going to let him. If they were going to go on this mission and have it be successful then, they had to clear the air. Their were things the professor had insinuated and Scott couldn't let it go. He needed to put his own mind at ease so that he could focus solely on the mission.

Finding him in the danger room he over road the access command and stalked in. Zoning in on Logan neither of them spoke for a few moments, when it was clear to Scott that Logan wasn't going to make an effort he took a deep breath.

"Are you going to tell me what happened. I'm not the professor, I'm completely in the dark here, I would like some sort of explanation. I think I'm owed that much at least."

"I don't owe you nothin' bub. Whatever debt you think I may have owed has been paid in full and them some."

Scott was at the end of his rope, he chocked out "put yourself in my place, she was, no she is my wife. What do you expect, you may see me as "up tight straight arrow Cyclops", but I'm really Scott Summers, who loves his wife with all his soul, and whose heart is broken. It is really too much that I know what happened it that too much to ask from you."

Pouncing on Scott and grabbing him by his perfectly collared shirt Wolverine barked "What about you, what about all of you, all _you_ see is Wolverine. A mindless animal, whose sole purpose is to kill and fuck. What about what's owed to _me_. How many times have I died for you, for all of you. Who's going to pay that debt, huh Cyclops, you, you and your fancy X-men."

"_Please_, I need to know, just tell me." Scott was begging.

The pleading broke through all the rage in Logan, God he was tired, so tired. "You want the play by play huh. Well you'll have to take it up with your pretty little _Wife_, she locked me up real tight in my head, and let Wolverine out to play, and he ain't very happy about it." Sighing rather audible he continued so quietly that that Scott had to strain to hear him. "I….. she came to me, said she'd get me my memories back, and I let her in, _I_ let her in. Then I felt this sharp pain in my head. That's the last real memory I have. The next thing I knew it was over. I could tell by the smells in the room what happened."

You could have heard a pin drop with the silence in the room. Finally Logan spoke.

"I never would've done it." He sounded so broken, not only had his body betrayed him, but his mind had been violated, stripped away to suit the whims of a madwoman.

Scott knew that, that was his way of trying to make a mends with him and as for Scott it was more than enough. "I'm sorry for judging you, the things that I said before……. I don't think we will ever be square. You've done more for the team and the school than you'll ever get credit for but, one day, one day I'll try."

Slipping back to into his leader role "be ready we leave in 20 minutes" he stood up and held out his hand.

Logan grunted and let Scott help him up.

_End Flashback_

* * *

Cyclops hoped that Wolverine would step up to the plate should anything happen to him. Putting his tendencies to run aside, he had everything that was needed to be a great leader. He was loyal to his team mates and always put himself first in front of any danger. Deep in his heart he hoped that Rogue and Wolverine could come to peace with the things that had happened, just as he had. Although they kept their relationship private, Scott wasn't blind and knew that they had been seeing each other. And he had to admit to himself that it made Logan a better man, that Rogue made Logan a better man. Somehow he knew that if Rogue didn't make it out in one piece Logan would be lost, and Wolverine would be uncontrollable. _Could the beast live in the body of the man, if he was dead inside. _Scott didn't think so, but he hoped.

Landing the Blackbird just outside the compound, the sun had set, and there was barely any light left. As they filed out, and splint into three teams, they stealthy began to make their way into the Lab.

Cyclops was in the lead on the north side along with ShadowCat, Beast, and Cannonball. Their part in the mission was to break in through the lower back part of the compound and destroy any and all evidence having to do with the experiments and mutants.

Cyclops was in the lead and Kitty was in the rear, she hadn't paid attention to her footing and fell into a large trench. With a yelp of surprise the other X-men were turning back looking for her. Cyclops was cursing, and while beast was trying to reach out a hand for her.

Cannonball using his thermo energy, made a small ball in his hand to get a better look at where shadowCat had fallen, when the light shone down all the X-men gasped and Kitty passed out from the shock.

Chancing a brighter light from his power to get a better look, the sight before them brought tears to Beasts eyes. There were hundreds of dead mutants. Most of them just children, while some were visible mutants others seemed quite normal.

Cyclops took control and had Cannonball slide down, grab ShadowCat and propel himself out of the trench. Quickly snapping kitty out of her daze they resumed their way into the back side of the building. Once they made it inside Cyclops contacted team A to create a diversion.

_**A/N: Hope that came across the way I wanted. Cyclops is a great leader but he is also his own worst enemy. Thought the quote described him perfectly.**_


	13. Chapter 13

_A/N: Thanks for hanging in there a few more chapters should wrap up this story. Hope you enjoy this chapter._

**Chapter 13 We must fight to Run Away**

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_**I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty or give me death.  
Patrick Henry**_

It was a simple plan, create a diversion, destroy evidence and rescue any remaining mutants inside. Three separate teams one for each tack, but as always nothing is ever simple.

Gambit, received the message from Cyclops to activate the bombs that were in place. The place lit up brighter than the fourth of July. Pyro lit any and all objects that had gone flying into the air creating more destruction. Iceman had covered the front in ice so that once the troops came out it would slow them down. Meanwhile Havok and Polaris were on the left flank waiting for the multitude of soldiers that were making their way out to see what was happening.

All too soon there were dozens of guards with guns aiming in the direction of Pyro, Gambit, and Iceman. With a sneer on his face Pyro created a wall of fire in front of the soldiers, he was so full with rage that the wall feed off his emotions and grew in size licking at the soldiers bodies. The thought of Rogue inside and being experimented on and prodded at like she was no better than an animal, made Pyro mad with fury. How anyone could not love her, was unconceivable, and to hurt her was unfathomable to him. The wall of fire burned so hot the soldiers hair was singeing, and their weapons grew hot in their hands, forcing them to drop the hot metal. The Pyromaniac was blinded by his fury, the love that he had for the southern beauty fuelling his darker emotions. He could feel the threads of his control giving away, as the fire grew to enormous proportions, he couldn't even hear Gambit shouting at him. The agonizing screams of the soldiers didn't stop him as they began melting before him. Only feeling the satisfaction flow threw him, as they turned to ash.

Gambit and Iceman were shocked to see their team member burn the soldiers alive that they never noticed more soldiers filing to the right of them. They never saw the soldier raise his weapon and aim it at Pyro.

Polaris caught the flash of metal and acted as quickly as she could, using her power to try and pull the gun out of the soldiers grasp, however it was a split second to late and a tipped bullet grazed the side of Pyro's head, effectively putting him out of commission and the fire all but went out.

Havok acting quickly let out plasma blasts to distract the soldiers, and give Iceman a chance to pull Pyro out of the line of fire and get him back to the blackbird. Gambit regaining his composure joined in the battle sending out his charged guards at the armed men to disperse the clusters they were in.

Turning completely to clear ice, Iceman tried to retrieve Pyro, while Polaris took their guns away from them. Gambit and Havok used their powers along with their combat skills to fight off the soldiers as they piled out of what was left of the main entrance to the compound.

Meanwhile Wolverine and his team (which was made up of Nightcrawler, Mirage, and Colossus) were waiting for the bulk of soldiers to come out so they could sneak in from the South East side to get inside and rescue Rogue, Sabertooth and any other mutants that may still be alive. Logan wanted so desperately to help his team members when he saw Pyro go down but Wolverine took over and knew that getting to Rogue was a priority, biting back a growl, he signalled for his team to follow him into the side entrance.

* * *

Taking a deep breath, Rogue tried to hold on to the remaining strength she had left(which wasn't much), repeating the same mantra in her head over and over again, _I have to get out I have to get out_. Using the wall to help support her up. God she was so cold, the flimsy hospital gown did little to cover her, combined with bare feet against the concrete on the floor sent chills up her spine. She tried to move as quickly as possible, trying to ignore the gush of warm blood that tricked down the inside of thigh, and the throbbing pain in the base of her spine. She didn't want to think about what it meant, it wasn't the time, or the place to mourn for things that couldn't be helped. Concentrating on the pain in her abdomen, because the pain in her heart was so much greater.

Reaching the end of the corridor, the whole place shook bringing Rogue to the floor once again. The sounds of explosions and alarms went off and the hole place went to hell. Rogue tried her best to hide behind some debris as soldiers ran through the corridor, guns in hand.

Finally some luck was on her side the were heading in the opposite direction, once the way was clear Rogue made her way towards the holding chamber they had Victor in. She hoped that whatever had made that explosion was help, but she couldn't be sure, even if it was she didn't know if she could face her would be rescuers, it seemed all too late for her. She couldn't remember much, mostly feelings, and they weren't very pleasant. Her worst nightmares had come true, wanting to at least spare Victor any more agony. The guilt ate away at her, he may not be a good man, or very honourable, but he was here because of her, because they were looking for her and found him, found them both. She trudged on, _welcoming a fate of certain death_.

_**A/N: Thought I would show Pyro's dark side, he might be an X-men, but he's still very unpredictable, and I like the idea that he loves Rogue without wanting anything in return, only wanting her safe. Hope you guys liked it, let me know what you think.**_


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14 And We all Fall Down**

**_Well guys here you have it. Sorry for taking so long to up date. I was on a short vacation and then I was sick. I'm starting to get over it, and my creative juices are flowing. I'd like to thank lvswtht and FluidDegree, for always reviewing and giving the guts to continue the story. Hope you enjoy this next chapter._**

A/N : Danielle Moonstar (Mirage) was at one point part of the X-men (_which I do not own I wish I did_). Her powers are she can generate astral images in the form of an individual's greatest fear or desire. Also a few other latent powers.

* * *

**"_I guess when your heart gets broken you sort of start to see cracks in everything. I'm convinced that tragedy wants to harden us and our mission is never to let it."_**

Wolverine moved stealthy passed the bulk of the soldiers with his team in tow. Mirage followed behind him in case she needed to create a diversion for them. Nightcrawler came shortly after her, and for obvious reasons Colossus was bringing up the rear.

Trying to use his nose to get a sent on Rogue or any other mutants was a little more difficult than he had anticipated. Their was a strong smell of antiseptic and bleach in every direction so potent that it stung his eyes and nose. Wolverine couldn't help the growl that escaped him, he was becoming more and more frustrated. It didn't help that the building felt like it was going to come down at any moment from the explosives they had planted, and with Havoc and Polaris's blasts, it felt like the very foundation would was giving.

Wolverine knew that he needed to find someone any one and make them talk, to tell them exactly where Rogue was and where the holding cells were, looking in every corridor was simply out f the questions it was going to take too long. Hopefully Mirage would be able to help in that department.

"okay we need to act quick, I can sense one around the corner, I'll corner him, Mirage use your power on him, when I ask him stuff, ease up a bit and if he doesn't say anything then hit him harder, I want him to reek of fear. Let's hope that he'll talk quick. I don't think the building can hold up much longer."

As soon as Wolverine had him cornered, Mirage sent out a astral image out to the soldier which took form of dozens of rats taking bits out of him. His screams were deafening to Wolverine, who motioned for Mirage to ease up on her power. Getting close enough to whisper in the soldier's ear he asked him where they were holding Rogue and Sabertooth, getting the information was pretty easy, he proceeded to knock him out cold. Deciding that Rogue was closer than Sabertooth he led his team there first, not that it would have mattered the most important thing was getting to her, and making sure she was safe.

The growl that escaped Wolverine could be heard in the hole compound, he couldn't have been more frustrated, they were right outside of her cell and there was no Rogue only a passed out soldier. Taking a quick sniff, he ordered Nightcrawler and Mirage to get the mutants that were still alive back to the Blackbird. Taking Colossus with him they made their way to the only other place he could think of where they were holding Sabertooth.

"She'd better be there damn it".

While ShadowCat was on the computer deleting files, she couldn't help the tears that sprang to her eyes, as she caught tidbits of the horrific experiments that were being done on the mutants that had passed through the facility. Cyclops was using the old fashioned way, and making a big bon fire where the hard copy files where.

Just as he was about to light the files on fire a name stood out from the rest, grabbing and stuffing the file along with the one next to it in his uniform, he quickly lit the rest on fire.

Inside Cerebro Xavier was monitoring the progress of the X-men. He ever so slightly made Cyclops pick up those particular two files, that just so happened to be Rogue's and Sabertooth. Also planting a mild suggestion that if they didn't get out alive to destroy the files.

He was also trying to help Wolverine keep his berserker rage in check they needed to find Rogue and Sabertooth and get them out of there. He could sense their metal signatures and wanted to get them out alive. He wasn't sure what mental of physical state they were in but he had to try. There were where they were because of his blind faith in someone that no longer existed. He was so immersed in what was happening at the lab compound that he never noticed the door to Cerebro open. He never noticed Jean approach him from behind. The last thing he remembered before he passed out was the blinding pain as Jean ripped through his mind tearing down all his mental blocks. The last thing he saw as he turned around was the smile on Jean Grey's face.

"How do you like it Charles, feels nice doesn't it", and the hole place lit red.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15 ?????****Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they?**

**A/N This is a semi dark chapter. I have split the chapter in two for those of you that are not into extreme gore. So please skip part 2 of this chapter and wait for Chapter 17. I'll do a little recap without the gore in that chapter. Once Again Please skip part 2 of this if you are faint of heart.**

* * *

_"Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more." ----Erica Jonq_

Stalking the corridor Wolverine was so close to the edge that Logan couldn't even see through the haze any longer. Barely holding on to any semblance of sanity, it was all shattered when he took a sniff and smelt the faint trace of blood, Rogues blood. Wolverine broke at a dead run following the metallic smell that clung in the air.

She was feeling faint from the blood loss, but still she trudged on, not wanting to give up until they were out of there. She was so close she could feel it, going down the last corridor and punching in with the pass the doors slid open. If her heart wasn't already broken it would have at the sight before her eyes. Sabertooth was strapped down to a metal table with all sorts of tubes coming in and out of him. He looked pail and his face sunken it. Although still quite big, his normal muscle mass has been reduced by at least half. They were sucking the life right out of him. He was suck a pitiful sight. She went over and started pulling out the tubes as the tears fell down her cheek. Once they were all out she gently caressed his face and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

"Well if it isn't my little pet, returning to her master".

Rogue abruptly turned around to be faced with Dr. Claw, smirking at her as his eyes roamed her body making her feel more dirty if that was even possible. Rogue was torn in two, a part of her wanted to shriek away run and hide, another part of her wanted to charge at him and gouge out his bloody eyes with his very own robotic hand. Swallowing hard she didn't make a move.

"Come on Rogue you know how much we enjoyed our time together don't be shy with me now" chucking so loudly that the echo resonated in the large room. He Started to come towards her and Rogue couldn't help the whimper that escaped her throat. Trying hard not to show any fear was becoming impossible, he was at arms length when she started to move away to the right trying hopelessly to put distance between them.

Dr. Claw couldn't get enough of taunting Rogue it brought out the best of him. She was the perfect specimen, it scientific terms. As far as a human being she just a used up piece of trash, the combination drove the good Dr. even more insane. He wanted to be her master and destroy all at the same time. He would get an overpowering rush whenever they were in the same room together.

"Don't run away Rogue I know how much you liked our alone time. It's just the two of us right now, your little friend over there is out for the count, we can have some fun together".

It was a loosing battle Rogue was so weak she could feel her legs starting to give she wanted so very badly to run, but what was she leaving Sabertooth too. What fate awaited him, only more torture and death. Before she could really think of what her next move was she heard the swoosh of the doors slide open to reveal a very pissed off Wolverine, claws and all.

"Logan" all kinds of feeling accompanied by a few scattered images came to her as she said his name, Rogue just stared at him. Not quite trusting her eyes, was this another illusion, had she finally gone crazy. She was so confused, not having all of her memories and having such strong emotions towards the man standing in the door. She could feel his eyes accessing her body trying to see what condition she was in. It almost brought comfort to her. But still there was something holding her back.

In the time that Logan and Rogue were having their "reunion" Dr. Claw had reached for his gun taking aim at Wolverine "let's see how your friend handles this".

Rogue blinked and knew what he meant, the gun was one of the prototypes that he had mentioned during the last round of experiments. She was pretty sure that whatever it was would take down Wolverine permanently.

Before he could pull the trigger Rogue threw herself in front of Wolverine and taking the shot that was meant for him, right in the back.

Just as the shot went off Colossus came in the room only to see Rogue fall in Wolverine's arms. Being steel armed had it's advantages as he went right to the Dr. and took the gun away from him before another he had a chance to take another shot. Restraining him by tying up with rope that was lying nearby.

Wolverine just whimpered at seeing the fallen Rogue. Holding his hands to her face hoping that she would just take what she needed to heal herself. Rogue opened her eyes and started at him.

"I …" Rogue sputtered but breathing was becoming extremely difficult. The bullet had hit her left lung.

"shhh don't say anything baby just hang on, open up your connection so you can take what you need".

"I can't…..the drugs…won't let me, comes and goes" coughing and choking she tried to continue. " my memories are gone" taking deep breaths "but I… I" she closed her eyes and tried desperately to focus. She was pretty sure that this was the last thing she'd be saying there just wasn't anything left, to go on, her last hope had literally been ripped out of her.

Forcing herself to open her eyes, she started into the eyes of the man she loved, no matter what she loved him, even if he didn't, even if it was all misguided and clouded she still loved him and wanted him happy. Maybe after she told him that she could go.

"just remember that I ………. I love you,…… be happy Logan".

Trying to memorize the plains on his face the length of his hair, the tone of his skin, she gently closed her eyes with a smile on her face, maybe now she could go?

The Wolverine inside roared with anger she still had a pulse there was till time.

_**A/N: Once Again, Pleas skip the next chapter if you are faint of heart there is a very gorey scence, I will do a recap in chapter 17 without the gore. Thank you.**_


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16 Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they? Part 2**

**This is not for the faint of heart, very gross scene. You have been warned. Sorry if this grosses you guys out but I thought it was a fitting end to a certain character. Once again please skip this chapter and wait for chapter 17 I will do a quick recap without the gore in Chapter 17. Thank you.**

* * *

_**It ain't pretty, but it has to be done!**_

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The Wolverine inside roared with anger she still had a pulse there was till time.

Wolverine was lost in a haze of red baring his teeth he spoke "Colossus get Nightcrawler here, teleport her to the blackbird along with Hank, now".

Turning to the Dr. he could smell the fear on him and it only made him snicker. "Just how I like them nice and scared, what's the matter doc afraid of your experiments".

As slow as Wolverine would have wanted to make the good Dr. suffer he also knew that they were working against the clock. Going right up to the doctor and dragging his claws across his chest deep enough to sting and draw blood. Then taking one claw and stabing him in the gut and twisting ever so slowly to the right. "I'm sure your going to enjoy this as much as Rogue and Sabertooth enjoyed your "testing". Turning him over and grabbing a long metal rod that was lying on the ground "yeah, your going to really enjoy this doc, when I'm done you'll be screaming like a stuck pig" ramming the rob right up his ass. The screams that were heard were so horriffic, and had Dr. Cameron Fitzgerald, begging for mercy, to just be put down.

Wolverine wasn't finished yet, still not satisfied he pulled out the metal rod, that came out with blood and guts, stabbing him in his good hand with such a force that he was pinned to the floor. Finally satisfied the Dr. would suffer for quite awhile before he painfully and slowly bleed to death.

He moved on to where Sabertooth was. Colossus was just coming back into the room after having had Rogue taken by Nightcrawler back between the two they grabbed Sabertooth and made their way out and into the night.

**_A/N: Sorry if you guys found this a little extreme but I thought that the character fit the crime so to speak. r and r._**


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17 ****And from the ashes the Phoenix shall rise**

_A/N: Once again sorry for the delay in updating but I've been sick again, and just wasn't up to going thought the chapter. _

_well the first paragraph is for all you that skipped chapter 16, it was pretty gory. However please be warned that the ending to this chapter is a little strong as well. Not quite as bad as chapter 16 but still if you have a week stomach or aren't't into that then please don't read the last paragraph. I thought about splitting it again but, I though it would just ruin the story._

_**A/N: I've also had a lot of FB on having this be a happy ending, I'm not great at writing the happy stuff , this is a really angsty fic. That being said I'm not against an alternate ending depending on the feedback. I'll leave it up to the readers, I'm sure you'll let me know.**_

* * *

_**Cruel is a matter of perspective. Jack Sparrow**_

Lugging back Sabertooth to the blackbird gave Wolverine a lot of time to think about what had happened to the doctor. A part of him wanted to be ashamed for his actions leaving the doctor bleeding to death in his own guts but, the more primal part of him knew that he was getting what was coming to him. Had Sabertooth been in any better shape he was sure that it would have been much worse. As it was Wolverine was covered in blood and other matter that he was choosing to ignore at the moment.

As soon as Wolverine and Colossus had Sabertooth on board, Havok and Polaris pulled back. Once out of Range Havok aimed a plasma blast at the last of the explosives at the left side of the base to the compound, creating a huge blast and effectively bringing down anything that was left of the horrific mutant testing facility.

Pyro was unconscious but stable for the moment. Sabertooth was hooked up to an IV feeding him saline to rehydrate him, it seemed that his mutation was keeping him alive. Cyclops had also been hit by some kind of plasma gun and was also unconscious he was stable as well. Rogue was another story. He was trying everything he could think of just to keep her alive, but until he got back to the med lab and figured what had been done to her. Rogue had lost an enormous amount of blood combined with unknown amount of drugs in her system, Beast didn't hold out much chance that she'd make it past the next few hours.

Glancing a look at Wolverine who was beside him and holding on to Rogues hand like a life line, he couldn't keep the pity out of his eyes. The once mighty Wolverine looked like a lost child, barely holding on to reality. Beast didn't dare utter a word not wanting to have Wolverine turn on him.

The mood on the Blackbird was quite sombre, each member hoping that those injured would be alright, all just wanting to be home and get some much needed rest, no one suspecting what was waiting for them at home.

Once the injured X-men were stabilized in the med lab, Beast tended to Rogue's most obvious wounds which were the bullet wound, removing it and stitching it up. The miscarriage seemed to be normal as possible. After briefly letting Wolverine know that she was stable for now, however things could turn for the worst at any moment. Beast began to pour over the files on Rogue, and try to seek the best course of action, he was sure that if he could reverse the effects of the drugs and shock her powers to take at least a little bit of Wolverine's mutation then she would as least have a fighting chance.

Beast was so immersed in his reading of the files that he never noticed Jean was not where he had left her. Until Scott started coming to, and calling out for her did he realize that she was not laying in the unconscious state he had left her in.

"Jean"

Just as Scott uttered the name Beast took a split second to analyze the situation and realize that they were all in danger. Wolverine had also heard Scott and began to sent her out with Beast following close behind.

Havok had been with Scott and also heard him he was on his way to follow Wolverine and Beast when Scott called to him.

" Alex, help me".

"Scott, you have to rest, once I know what's going on I'll let you know".

"No help me…..up. I need to be there what ever is going on I need to be there. Now help me, or I'll crawl there myself".

"Fine just let me get a wheel chair".

* * *

Wolverine was in full predator mode, searching for Jean, with beast right behind him. His senses took him straight to Cerebro. Inside they found the professor lying on the floor of a holographic replica of the upper part of the mansion.

Beast came rushing forward to check on the professor, sighing as he felt a pulse when the doors opened to reveal Alex wheeling in a distressed looking Scott.

"He has a pulse, I can't really tell what's wrong with him it would be best to get him back to the med lab and run some tests". Beast was about to lift him up when the professor started to come to.

"We must get to Jean, right away". Just as the professor was about to continue a loud shrieking scream broke through the silence. The professor's eyes glazed over for a bit and the screaming increased in volume as Wolverine winced in pain. He was sure that no realized that sounds like that actually popped his ears drums and was quite painful until his healing factor took care of it.

"She's on the roof. I've managed to trap her in here, and she's not exactly at her best at the moment".

Even if they didn't know where she was they could have followed Jean's trail of destruction. The mansion replica looked like it had been hit by a tornado. All the windows had been shattered the wood of the walls splintered, the various furniture turned upside down. Had it been the real mansion they were sure that there would have been bodies of the students to add to the destruction.

Scott looked around and the tears stung his eyes as he thought about what Jean had done, not just to the mansion but her hand in the atrocious acts that had been done to the mutants. To mutant children. How could the woman he loved be capable of such cruelty, after reading about the things that had been done to them made him shutter. There had always been places that he couldn't reach in Jean, but he didn't think that they were this dark, this sinister. The malice in her actions was undeniable, and unforgivable.

Alex helped him the rest of way as the wheelchair couldn't e wheeled up to the roof and Beast carried the professor. Wolverine as always was in the lead, and out for blood, even Scott couldn't deny it to him. After seeing the condition that Rogue was in he really couldn't blame him or try to stop him. It was evident that Jean needed to be stopped, if Wolverine could do it then maybe it was best, because he wasn't sure he had what it took to look her in the eyes and finish her off.

Jean Grey was standing on the ledge of the roof glowing red and anger sketched on her face. Xavier tried to gently tap on her mind and try and sway her away. The result was one pissed off Jean.

"Stay out of my head" Jean hit the professor with a powerful psychic wave and had him howling in pain.

Wolverine stocked forward claws barring only to be flung back against the brick wall and knocked out. Jean grinned as he went down.

"Just the way I w anted to see you Logan flat on your back".

"Jean" Scott called out to her, in hopes of jarring back the old Jean the one that was kind and good, the one that would never hurt anyone. For a small moment he thought he caught a glimpse of something familiar in her eyes, but then the red shone even brighter.

"Scott Summers, my beloved fool of a husband. What makes you think that you ever knew me at all. All I ever was to you was the perfect little trophy wife, the one that could never do any wrong. Let me in on a little secret Scott Summers they were all better than you, ever single one of them". She winked at him before began to psychically tear his mind apart.

The pain was like nothing that Scott could describe in a last ditch attempt to make it stop he tore off his glasses and sent an optic beam right at Jean. For a few seconds it hit Jean hard, but she raised her hand and grit her teeth and with a psychic shield began pushing Scott's power back to him, Jean kept pushing until she was right up to his face.

"What do you say Scott one last kiss goodbye" just as Jean leaned into press her lips to Scott's, Havok blasted her back to the other side of the roof knocking her in to the brick next to Wolverine. Scott collapsed exhausted from the amount of strength Jean had taken from him. Jean got up to retaliate against Alex, when the professor spoke to her.

"Jean, stop this right now. This isn't you, you have to take back the control your emotions have over you. You would never hurt anyone, look at what your doing, think about what you've done. There is still time, you can stop this, you can be the person that you were before". While the professor was speaking to her he was invading her mind with tendrils of psychic doubt trying to confuse and shock her. So he could buy them time. Jean was dangerous and growing more powerful with every moment it seemed the her emotions were tied to her powers and the more angry she got the more power she could wield.

Jean was absolutely furious, they were trying to trick her. First they wouldn't let her out of this stupid fake world and now they had Scott and the professor trying to break her mind. Jean fought back by tooth and nail, they wouldn't get the best of her no way. She'd get them all every single last one of them, especially that southern little bitch, she was the one that was at fault. If it wasn't for her, she could have had them all and no one would know. Don't worry I'm still coming for you my dear.

"Jean look at me, just follow my voice, everything is going to be alright".

"Yes professor everything is going to be just perfect" the change in her voice was evident as she continued "just the way that _I_ want it". She hit the professor with everything she had, the professor screamed in pain clutching his head. Jean just hit him harder her eyes darkened and she didn't stop until the professor was seizing on the ground. Jean smirked as she was finally satisfied that she had finished off her long time father figure without a second of remorse.

"So who's next. I say I finish what I started, what do you think Alex, it's time to say good bye to Scott". No sooner were the words out of her mouth when her eyes widened in shock. Both her and Alex looked down only to see two sets of three nine inch claws sticking out of her chest.

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**_A/N: hope you didn't't find that too gory, but again thought Jean had it coming to her, hope you let me know. I hope to have the next chapter up soon but I'm still not a hundred percent so I can't say for sure._**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18 What goes around come back around

A/N: to all the readers that hung in, thank you so much especially Corinne who gave me the courage to keep this story going. Sometimes life gets in the way. The ending is almost here. Please read and review.

_**How do you shoot the devil in the back? What if you miss? ~Verbal; The Usual Suspect~**_

Wolverine started to come to just in time to see Xavier seizing, with bile coming out of his mouth. He saw Jean zoning in on Cyclops and knew that this was the last chance that they had, it was now or never. Using his stealth mode Wolverine snuck up on Jean and stuck her from behind with his claws. Not wanting to leave a job half done, with all of his force he dragged his claws up before retracting them, as Jean dropped to the floor with a loud thud.

Luckily this time he had managed to avoid most of the blood getting on him. Leaving her where she was, he headed straight for beast "I'll get the professor back to the med lab you get to Rogue".

Beast knew better than to argue with Wolverine. Following hot on his heels as Wolverine gave the command for the hologram to end, as they headed out of Cerebro.

Alex was almost too stunned to follow watching as Jean's blood pooled by her hair, a groan from Scott shook him out of his trance.

Jean was on the floor and knew that she had just a few moments left, and not even in the end could she control her emotions, still laying blame on those around her for current state. Wanting still to do the most damage possible, letting the last of her powers loose she aimed to finish Cyclops once and for all, she would take him with her where ever that was, it was a fitting end. Jean hit Scott with a even more powerful physic blast than the one on the professor, Scott was already weakened from the earlier attack.

Scott was in so much pain his mind felt like it was going to explode, he could feel the cold tendrils of physic waves as Jean was invading his mind. The pressure was so intense that he felt his eardrums actually pop, the pulsing of his brain was just too much and Scott stopped fighting all together, one last spasm and he was gone with a look of agony sketched on his face.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19 Laid out in Lavender**

First I apologize for taking so long but I couldn't decide on which direction I wanted to take the finale chapter in. For those of you that were patiently waiting for this here you go and thank you so much for hanging in there for so long.

_**The tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives. **__**Albert Schweitzer**__**  
**_

No sooner had Logan finished placing the Professor in a bed, that he sensed a slight stirring on the other side. Rushing to her side he took it a good sign that she might be coming too.

Rogue felt her whole body burn as she started to drift back into consciousness. Slowly blinking her eyes and trying to focus not really remembering where she was. The bright light had her thinking that maybe she was back at the lab. Everything was just so out of focus and her memories were just so out of reach like a dream almost.

Looking around and trying to focus on her surrounding she saw Logan staring back at her, trying to make sure she wasn't going to disappear.

"Logan".

God was it really him, was this another memory, that her mush for a brain has come up with, the thought brought tears to her eyes. She couldn't even trust her own eyes, this is what her miserable life had been reduced to, more pain, more misery, and no hope at all. There was just nothing left for her to go to. Her entire life was just a string of disappointments and betrayal, could anyone really blame her for just giving up, she was so tired, tired of feeling, and tried of being, her last hope had literally been ripped out of her.

"Marie, please open your eyes baby. Please just try and take what you need, please Marie, I can't live without you, I've tried and it's not really living. Look at me please".

Those words they were so foreign to her ears, could Logan really be saying them, she was so, so scared to open her eyes and find it all vanish.

Trying to steady her breath she opened her eyes only to find a pair of beautiful hazel eyes staring back at her so desperate that it took her breath away. The love was like a mirror, and made the moment so bittersweet. It was like coming around full circle.

She could feel a numbness from her toes rising up to her chest, and that's when the machines started going crazy, Rogue was gasping for breath, she could see Logan's face turn to desperate horror. She wanted to say something anything to comfort him tell him that she loved him and would always be with him even if he couldn't see her. But she couldn't form the words.

"Please Marie, try for me, please…… don't you dare leave me".

Logan was desperate, she was in his arms slipping away and there was nothing he could do. He could fight a thousand armies and still come out on top, but couldn't save the woman he loved. He could smell death coming and a feeling of complete helplessness overcame him. There was just nothing he could do.

"I love you, I've always loved you, don't leave me……" Wolverine was sobbing, it was the most pitiful sight, Hank knew there wasn't anything that he could do. Rogue was slipping away and all he could do was watch as two lives were ending.

Rogue knew that this was it, she could feel it, there was a calm inside her head for the first time since her mutation had made its ugly head know, the curse that had tormented her for years, it was almost like a cloud lifting, she could have gone in Peace if not for the cries, and pleas that were coming from her beloved.

With the last bit of strength Rogue had she took Logan's face in her hands and concentrated, she pushed and pushed till blood was pouring from every where, her ears, nose, mouth, her eyes. She reached up and kissed Logan for the last time just barely nipping his lips, Logan returned the kiss with tears pouring out of his eye, "I love you too, always".

Logan held on to Rogue long after she had passed, Beast left him to grieve on his own not wanting to intrude on a private moment.

After sometime Logan put Rogue down and cleaned her up. Not wanting anyone else to do this, taking the tags from his neck he placed them around her neck, where they never should have left. He began to meticulously clean her up, the whole time Rogue was there in his head, trying to provide words of comfort, telling him that she died loving him to the very end and wherever her spirit was, she was finally at peace with her baby.

Just the thought made Logan weep bitter tears of regret and longing. He had had happiness in the palm of his hand, and fate had ripped it from him. He closed his eyes and could picture Marie, holding their beautiful baby in her arms and the happiness made him awe-stricken. He was forever cursed to never have happiness, he'd always be the outsider looking in. He was burying the only family he would ever have. No matter how much of Rogue was in his head, it would always be a whisper, a ghost that he could never touch or hold or love. The man that was Logan was beyond crushed, and the animal that was Wolverine howled in agony for the loss of it's mate.

Shortly after burying Rogue and the others Wolverine took off on his motorcycle, cursed to forever be alone.

One day when it didn't hurt so much he'd come back, he'd lead the X-Men, and make Rogue proud of him, but that's another story.

Laid out in lavender

Meaning: Prepared for burial. The phrase has also been used to mean 'show something in the best possible light'.

This is the end, might be an alternate ending, again it depends on the feedback! read and review, I just might give it that happy ending with an even better twist!!!


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